Tomorrow we’re on the brink, the last day and night of this thing and, whilst I’ll in some ways I’ll be relieved that it’s over – because it’s been a constant presence, a responsibility hanging over me for the past month or so, a daily missive of sorts – I’ll also miss it.  I don’t want to stop.  It’s been a way to talk out loud in a fragmented fashion that, rarely, for me – if not for you – adds up to something more than the sum of its parts.  I haven’t made this kind of space for thinking and commitment to articulating what and why since we sat in a park in Amsterdam however long ago and tried to put our thoughts down about what we might do, about why we might commit time and energy to something so uncertain.

It’s been quite a year. Quite a twenty years.

 

1) As we change, what shall we hold on to?       

I didn’t set out to do this. 

Hold on to what keeps us doing it.  If we’re lucky we might, in some moments, know what that is. 

Hold on to each other somehow.

2) As we change, what shall we have more of? 

More time between, more playing, more arguing, more time off, more passion for it, more freedom, more boldness, more seeing the world,  more conversation with people we don’t know, more of the simple and massive pleasure of doing and being.
 

3) What’s different about this change, from all of those along the way?

 For me – time’s running out.  It gets more significant. (And not, of course.  It becomes more important to be less serious.)

 

4) Can you, will you, do you want to change?

Always, never, constantly, tomorrow.  I’m an unpredictable fearless workaholic habituated lazy coward.  

 

5) What art will we make next year?

I want to make a piece of theatre*.

*And other things.

 

6) What art will we make in 3 years time?

I’ll want to make a piece of theatre**.

**And other things.

 

 7) What art will we make in 10 years time?

I might want to make a piece of theatre**

***And other things.

 

8) What art will we make in 20 years time?

I probably won’t want to make a piece of theatre***. 

But you can do just what you like.

***And my peace.

 

9) What habits would be useful to break?

Fear of each other.  Fear of offending each other.  Fear of offending others.

 

10) Where should we be?

Not in Manchester/England anymore. Sorry Toto. Time to go. Really. Last chance saloon. For all kinds of reasons.

 

11) How can you be heard?

I need to learn to write, to practice writing and to let myself do it.

 

12) What will you say?

Whatever the moment demands, whatever appears.  This, and that.

 

13) When will you stop?

If I could afford to, I’d stop now for a while. But I know I’d want to do something once in a while, so that’s not really stopping, is it?  I just need a break from it, I guess. 

(Can anybody help me with that?  info@qtine.com)

 

14) What hasn’t been said?

So many things. The world and his/her/their wife.

 

15) Again, what questions should I have asked?

All the ones I don’t know how to ask.